What's the equation dude?

What the heck - I slog day in a day out - I see the scale going down - 115 - 114.6 - 114 - 113.6 - 113.4 and then it is 113. Wow! 2 pounds in 4 days. And then one temptation - one dinner out (that too vegan and with the skewed respective appetite dividing the bill by 1/2 didnt seemed fair (well it's my hard-earned money and that was a huge bill)) and that's it - its back to 115. What's the deal - how does it work - can't debug it - is there a neural net there (hell'lo!).
Well since the day I was mentally born - I have these two issues - that I am overweight and that I have a bad hairstyle.
For today, let's just talk about issue one. And for it I credit my classmate (MB) in 10th when we were having some height weight ratio determination - for my weight (which at that that time was same as it is now) - he had exclaimed - "Girl's mein highest". At that point it sounded as if it was something like a "aakashvani"(I am sure I saw some lightening also up there...).
Losing weight is not impossible - have done that once - and constantly do that in intervals- but this time just don't feel motivated. I mean the last successful attempt was when I was below 18. Now I am wiser (before saying anything remember that you dont know how wise I was at 18)- Well - if I lose weight - I am not going to change my wardrobe (will continue to wear my oversized jackets and jeans). I think I am fairly active (except for mandatory 9 hours of sleep), my friend's car will still accomodate me as the 5th passenger, my insurance rate, my house rent etc etc will not change, nor will my coding style. I don't have to worry about gaining weight, rather I will save myself from future disappointments incase I later gain weight.
Infact I think there are advantages of being over-weight - one being getting rid of the fear that you will be overweight coz dude (dudette) you already are (its all about having the security of having the best case equal to worst case)! You can poke fun at all those anoeroxic self-weight-obsessed girls (pamper your alter-ego that is). And well the biggest one being- people who really love you will have more of you :).

P.S - Told ya - shouldn't have gotten me drunk.