Thursday, July 16, 2009


A perennial question that people ask me is "why did you leave a lucrative job and came to this movie industry where you might struggle to the end of the life and even not be able to get half of what I used to get earlier..and why so late"

Well here is my absolute honest answer:
For a long time growing, I believed people worked to earn. Blame it my middle class upbringing, or blame it on the fact that I was not born with the right foresight or blame it the fact that my father worked in a factory, managing huge machines and I felt that was the work he did for us to have money to eat and study. So I worked hard for a single purpose goal, maximize the earning I have. But then when I started working to maximize the money, thank God for Microsoft, I realized that I spend most of my day with my work than with the money. It occupies 8-10 hours of my day physically and much more mentally and probably will occupy most of my life. My relationship with my work define my relationship with myself. So then the better thing to do is choose the work I want to do and derive happiness accordingly. And my love for the idea of "creation" made me take this decision. Also film-making was a hobby that was going out of control. It forced me to take this decision. A decision lots of people thought I took in haste but I took it coz I didnt want to waste anymore hours of our life.
Again here, after making the shift, after making only 3-4 short films I am still struggling to learn the craft. And people wonder even more. Why? why? But I struggle because I choose the toughest things for myself.. Subjects that make me nervous, because I want to give myself opportunity to learn. Film school is not an opportunity to perform. Infact life is a great opportunity to learn.
The problem I see, so much prevalent in this world is that people try to follow standards set by others. The insecurity of failure has become the biggest motivation. The struggle is not to give what you think is the best but what you think everybody thinks would be the best.For some the difference is subtle, for some it is so hazy that they don't see it and work hard in this confusion shunting from one end to other, coming out with stories so desperate that they cannot feel it from the heart - feel the story, laugh and cry with it, get frustrated by it, get angry at it. Every movie is a woman, it has a life, it breathes. The movie should be made for that woman first. If you make her real and alluring, audience will seek her. She need not seek the audience. We are talking about real movies here and not the cacaphonies that people churn up because these people are lost, they work for the money's sake and not for the sake of their life.

Thursday, July 02, 2009

writer's block

I am so much struggling with the second half of my short fiction script... this post is dedicated to all those script writers who have a good concept and great exposition but no resolution. Horror script writers should particularly agree.