A little change of flavor -
Elizabeth Barett Browning (Love Sonnet VI)
Go from me.
Yet I feel that I shall stand
Henceforward in thy shadow. Nevermore
Alone upon the threshold of my door
Of individual life, I shall command
The uses of my soul, nor lift my hand
Serenely in the sunshine as before,
Without the sense of that which I forbore--
Thy touch upon the palm. The widest land
Doom takes to part us, leaves thy heart in mine
With pulses that beat double. What I do
And what I dream include thee, as the wine
Must taste of its own grapes. And when I sue
God for myself, He hears that name of thine,
And sees within my eyes -
the tears of two
Sunday, February 25, 2007
And please welcome ...
Well whoever said that the world consisted of only married or single people. Seems like they missed one category - which everyone is part of at some point in their life - yeah - the "about to marry" (ATM) folks.
And then it doesn't matter whether you know whom you are getting married to or whether you know who you cannot get married to - there is the realization of the inevitable - you know you are gonna get married by "next year".
This twilight zone of your life make you go through a surge of emotions and hence I feel that this state merits its own category. If you are committed - you know to whom that one phone call of the day will be directed to (incase you are doing the long distance thing - btw people having their bf/gf locally are eliminated from this survey -you are already on the other side of the fence guys). If you are single you hope that one of these days (in a conference or during a journey or in the bar or in the coffee shop) you meet that special person ...otherwise your parents will do the needful ...
I feel the ATMs (of all kind) are increasing by the day - probably because its a stage where you have benefits of either stages of your life. There is this carefreeness and independence and to a certain extent you do have a sense of direction as far as your personal life is concerned. It is like having rights but no responsibilities ...It is blissful - though the bliss can sometimes be marred by a sudden marriage invitation of your childhood friend in your inbox or worse still a devastating announcement by another childhood friend - "We are having a baby"! - What - so soon?
...and you know the eventuality (and with all honesty you look forward to it - coz it has its own perks) - however since every stage in life deserves some inertia - so does this ...I mean, when in your life could you afford sudden trips to Vegas, dropping drunk outside a bar, having a girl's (guy's) night out, weekends in office, coffee at 12 midnight or guiltless flirting with a stranger ...
And then it doesn't matter whether you know whom you are getting married to or whether you know who you cannot get married to - there is the realization of the inevitable - you know you are gonna get married by "next year".
This twilight zone of your life make you go through a surge of emotions and hence I feel that this state merits its own category. If you are committed - you know to whom that one phone call of the day will be directed to (incase you are doing the long distance thing - btw people having their bf/gf locally are eliminated from this survey -you are already on the other side of the fence guys). If you are single you hope that one of these days (in a conference or during a journey or in the bar or in the coffee shop) you meet that special person ...otherwise your parents will do the needful ...
I feel the ATMs (of all kind) are increasing by the day - probably because its a stage where you have benefits of either stages of your life. There is this carefreeness and independence and to a certain extent you do have a sense of direction as far as your personal life is concerned. It is like having rights but no responsibilities ...It is blissful - though the bliss can sometimes be marred by a sudden marriage invitation of your childhood friend in your inbox or worse still a devastating announcement by another childhood friend - "We are having a baby"! - What - so soon?
...and you know the eventuality (and with all honesty you look forward to it - coz it has its own perks) - however since every stage in life deserves some inertia - so does this ...I mean, when in your life could you afford sudden trips to Vegas, dropping drunk outside a bar, having a girl's (guy's) night out, weekends in office, coffee at 12 midnight or guiltless flirting with a stranger ...
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Who mixed my colors ?
Growing up, I always hated the idea of being hated. Equations in life were simple - if people hate you then they are probably someone to be wary of and if they don't they are your friends...Over the years - some cynicism has crept in ... instead of feelings of love and hate (which are absolute), feelings relative to my expectations have started making me wary of people or liking them. In my recent conversation with a friend - I had said that unsolicited affection can be more dangerous than unsolicited hatred. It was a thought that stayed with me. Why would anyone not like someone liking them. Is it because we have learnt from our experiences that affection without any expectation is rare. And though everytime we meet great people who exhibit such qualities and our faith in our original innocent hypothesis starts increasing - something happens that makes us realize its naivete'.
My friend told that she refused to give lift to a woman who was wearing torn clothes. Later her husband gave her lift and he found that her son was in dire need of some oxygen cylinder and she was too poor to afford it. My friend felt bad for not trusting her when it was her turn - but can she use this incident to give lift to a next person in torn clothes? Isn't it difficult to keep up with the idea of an ideal world - especially when you know that that one wrong person, that one wrong incident, that one drop of guard might ruin the rest of your life (or end it)...
Why is the world no longer black or white? why is it grey ..with varied shades...how do I keep up?
My friend told that she refused to give lift to a woman who was wearing torn clothes. Later her husband gave her lift and he found that her son was in dire need of some oxygen cylinder and she was too poor to afford it. My friend felt bad for not trusting her when it was her turn - but can she use this incident to give lift to a next person in torn clothes? Isn't it difficult to keep up with the idea of an ideal world - especially when you know that that one wrong person, that one wrong incident, that one drop of guard might ruin the rest of your life (or end it)...
Why is the world no longer black or white? why is it grey ..with varied shades...how do I keep up?
Thursday, February 15, 2007
The need ...
The need to love, the need to be loved, the need to trust, the need to justify, the need to feel secure, the need to protect, the need to be fair, the need to avenge, the need to lead, the need to be guided, the need to be cared, the need to parent ...
Do we keep passing on the favors ?
Do we keep passing on the favors ?
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Taming the ghost (literally)...
Ok honest -how many of us were scared of ghosts as a kid ? and how many of us really are till date...?
I was really scared of ghosts as a kid. You know those white semi-transparent things that you saw in the movies.. I remembered one incident when I mistook an old man dressed in all-white early morning as a ghost (inspite of him being fairly opaque) and totally taken aghast at this sudden face to face encounter I started screaming non-stop very loudly at him...the old man was later heard complaining of a chest pain ...
More recently the movies like "The Ring" and "The Grudge" in IIT kanpur lab scared me and the ring girl coming out the TV haunted me again and again ...
Even till late in US (one of my side theories is that since christians are buried instead of being burnt the chances of person turning into ghost is higher - I guess I took the term "rising from the grave" too literally) and I was scared of ghosts so much that I used to sleep with lights on till last year...However gradually the ghosts in the waking life started taking precedence and I started sleeping with the lights off...
Until a few days ago ... I had a dream that there is a ghost in the apartment and the horror was so much that I woke up and I thought I heard something ...and in that semi-concious state I could also hear my heart pounding faster and faster ...and then I came back in my 100% consciousness and found myself wide awake but dead scared.
And then I thought what if there indeed is a ghost out here and he/she/it turns up and in that sleepy and tired state I didnt have the energy to even scream- I thought I will make the ghost sit and talk about my problems in life - my car got a scratch, my water heater is leaking, my apartment is not clean, my code is not working and blah blah blah ...suddenly I felt that the ghost (or the fear of it) was gone...
I realized that though I couldn't get over my belief that ghosts exist I could however co-exist with them - I finally made my truce with that clan - afterall what will they get out of troubling a single girl...
I was really scared of ghosts as a kid. You know those white semi-transparent things that you saw in the movies.. I remembered one incident when I mistook an old man dressed in all-white early morning as a ghost (inspite of him being fairly opaque) and totally taken aghast at this sudden face to face encounter I started screaming non-stop very loudly at him...the old man was later heard complaining of a chest pain ...
More recently the movies like "The Ring" and "The Grudge" in IIT kanpur lab scared me and the ring girl coming out the TV haunted me again and again ...
Even till late in US (one of my side theories is that since christians are buried instead of being burnt the chances of person turning into ghost is higher - I guess I took the term "rising from the grave" too literally) and I was scared of ghosts so much that I used to sleep with lights on till last year...However gradually the ghosts in the waking life started taking precedence and I started sleeping with the lights off...
Until a few days ago ... I had a dream that there is a ghost in the apartment and the horror was so much that I woke up and I thought I heard something ...and in that semi-concious state I could also hear my heart pounding faster and faster ...and then I came back in my 100% consciousness and found myself wide awake but dead scared.
And then I thought what if there indeed is a ghost out here and he/she/it turns up and in that sleepy and tired state I didnt have the energy to even scream- I thought I will make the ghost sit and talk about my problems in life - my car got a scratch, my water heater is leaking, my apartment is not clean, my code is not working and blah blah blah ...suddenly I felt that the ghost (or the fear of it) was gone...
I realized that though I couldn't get over my belief that ghosts exist I could however co-exist with them - I finally made my truce with that clan - afterall what will they get out of troubling a single girl...
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Simply life
Simply life ...
A bright sunny day ..
tea with ginger
running into an old friend ..
trusting someone ...
a nice sweet
a kid's laughter...
an intense workout
movie with friends
a round of window shopping
15 pages of a good book ...
a hot shower
a hearty conversation
a clean apartment
simple home food
a sound sleep ..
simply life ...
"A simple life's my cup of tea"
A bright sunny day ..
tea with ginger
running into an old friend ..
trusting someone ...
a nice sweet
a kid's laughter...
an intense workout
movie with friends
a round of window shopping
15 pages of a good book ...
a hot shower
a hearty conversation
a clean apartment
simple home food
a sound sleep ..
simply life ...
"A simple life's my cup of tea"
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Well I am at it again! (some rambles)
Ever felt like Neo ... felt pre-programmed ...felt pre-destined?
Felt that your behavior, dreams, aspirations are predesigned in form (not content) - by something - may be at the core level by your needs, your desires, your insecurities ...but ...have you felt the constraints ? Have you felt constrained by your own survival instincts ?
- felt like you were slave before you were born ...or because you were born ...a slavery that doesn't extract your labour, nor does it curb your desires - coz it's easy to fight that out - but a slavery that ...that made you a human and not a bird ...that pre-defined you...
have you ever felt - helpless while comprehending anything that is magical, unexplainable, unfathomable, unachievable..why do we want what we want? why do we fear what we fear?
...and then have you ever missed that bird - the bird who could be you but is not - because you don't decide ... or do you decide ? Do you know?
Have you ever paid heed to this insane person within you ...
Monday, January 15, 2007
Hide and seek
...people play hide and seek with life ...sometimes we seek ...sometimes we hide ...
hope we always sought... But then we never know :)...
hope we always sought... But then we never know :)...
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Being flexible ...
Sam asked - "Is being flexible perceivied as having no opinion at all?"
How many times we only have a slight preference as to where we want to eat or what we want to do. But sometimes we do not express it because we let other people decide as we are "okay" with what others have in their mind. But is our okay with everything gives an impression that "he/she will agree for anything or everything?".
Where is the line - line between being agreeable and looking like a pushover ?
"If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings -- nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;"
How many times we only have a slight preference as to where we want to eat or what we want to do. But sometimes we do not express it because we let other people decide as we are "okay" with what others have in their mind. But is our okay with everything gives an impression that "he/she will agree for anything or everything?".
Where is the line - line between being agreeable and looking like a pushover ?
"If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings -- nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;"
Thursday, January 11, 2007
well the world is fair after all
The cafe' was closed today. I stopped at the vending machine in my office to have a helping of "Shrimp lo mein" - Good food for cheap-(2.35$) - I inserted 3 dollar bills - The packet came out - and what do I see - also all my money back - in 25 cents change.
Well after relishing it and realizing that my appetite is still not satisfied - and having the temptation of another free meal (the real motivation) - I inserted money again – the machine moved but the packet got stuck - and neither came the packet nor my money!
Eventually things do work out for themselves, you see ...
Well after relishing it and realizing that my appetite is still not satisfied - and having the temptation of another free meal (the real motivation) - I inserted money again – the machine moved but the packet got stuck - and neither came the packet nor my money!
Eventually things do work out for themselves, you see ...
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Played football
...unexpected turn of events - but a good one -
Am in the team for the next season!
(Details coming up - Too tired right now.)
Am in the team for the next season!
(Details coming up - Too tired right now.)
Saturday, January 06, 2007
Pursuit of Happyness
Must watch movie - Pursuit of Happyness
Trailer- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bp12T5hs3F8&mode=related&search=
Sometimes when things get too easy in life - you take everything , including your own potential for granted, movies like this just bring you back to be the person you had once set out to be!
People generally say that you can never achieve everything as per your satisfaction - if you don't have a car - you aspire for one - if you have a honda - you aspire for a beetel (so now you know it's a girl writing this blog) - and so on ...so you can never get satisfied - but well doesn't this dissatifaction keeps you going ... and in this pursuit aren't there immensely satisfying checkpoint moments that people living in their so-called blissful slumber do not experience. For me - it's tequila versus wine - I want to rule the world - let's save the buddhist philosophy for later years!
--
Anyways someone pointed me to my this year's horoscope - not pleased I surfed around and found various random horoscopes on the net and they all were so inconsistent among themselves that I just gave up ! However - there was one thing consistent in all of them:
Your expenditure wil exceed your income.
well I don't see my expenditure increasing ... so i think my income will decrease... err ...so what was the buddhist philosophy we were talking about ...
Trailer- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bp12T5hs3F8&mode=related&search=
Sometimes when things get too easy in life - you take everything , including your own potential for granted, movies like this just bring you back to be the person you had once set out to be!
People generally say that you can never achieve everything as per your satisfaction - if you don't have a car - you aspire for one - if you have a honda - you aspire for a beetel (so now you know it's a girl writing this blog) - and so on ...so you can never get satisfied - but well doesn't this dissatifaction keeps you going ... and in this pursuit aren't there immensely satisfying checkpoint moments that people living in their so-called blissful slumber do not experience. For me - it's tequila versus wine - I want to rule the world - let's save the buddhist philosophy for later years!
--
Anyways someone pointed me to my this year's horoscope - not pleased I surfed around and found various random horoscopes on the net and they all were so inconsistent among themselves that I just gave up ! However - there was one thing consistent in all of them:
Your expenditure wil exceed your income.
well I don't see my expenditure increasing ... so i think my income will decrease... err ...so what was the buddhist philosophy we were talking about ...
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Gin soaked boy
I'm the darkness in the light
I'm the leftness in the right
I'm the rightness in the wrong
I'm the shortness in the long
I'm the goodness in the bad
I'm the saneness in the mad
I'm the sadness in the joy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the ghost in the machine
I'm the genius in the gene
I'm the beauty in the beast
I'm the sunset in the east
I'm the ruby in the dust
I'm the trust in the mistrust
I'm the trojan horse in troy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the tiger's empty cage
I'm the mystery's final page
I'm the stranger's lonely glance
I'm the hero's only chance
I'm the undiscovered land
I'm the single grain of sand
I'm the christmas morning toy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the world you'll never see
I'm the slave you'll never free
I'm the truth you'll never know
I'm the place you'll never go
I'm the sound you'll never hear
I'm the course you'll never steer
I'm the will you'll not destroy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the half-truth in the lie
I'm the why not in the why
I'm the last roll of the die
I'm the old school in the tie
I'm the spirit in the sky
I'm the catcher in the rye
I'm the twinkle in her eye
I'm the jeff goldblum in the fly
Who am i?
My fav lines in italics ... what's yours?
I'm the leftness in the right
I'm the rightness in the wrong
I'm the shortness in the long
I'm the goodness in the bad
I'm the saneness in the mad
I'm the sadness in the joy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the ghost in the machine
I'm the genius in the gene
I'm the beauty in the beast
I'm the sunset in the east
I'm the ruby in the dust
I'm the trust in the mistrust
I'm the trojan horse in troy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the tiger's empty cage
I'm the mystery's final page
I'm the stranger's lonely glance
I'm the hero's only chance
I'm the undiscovered land
I'm the single grain of sand
I'm the christmas morning toy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the world you'll never see
I'm the slave you'll never free
I'm the truth you'll never know
I'm the place you'll never go
I'm the sound you'll never hear
I'm the course you'll never steer
I'm the will you'll not destroy
I'm the gin in the gin-soaked boy
I'm the half-truth in the lie
I'm the why not in the why
I'm the last roll of the die
I'm the old school in the tie
I'm the spirit in the sky
I'm the catcher in the rye
I'm the twinkle in her eye
I'm the jeff goldblum in the fly
Who am i?
My fav lines in italics ... what's yours?
Happy new year - oh well!
So there we go - another revolution around the sun - done - ..
So well how are you celebrating?
"..ummm well I am planning to do lots of things"
yeah so what are you gonna do ?
"err... well I am gonna have lots of fun"
---
Last time I felt cornered this way was when one of my uncles were interogating me on what I want to do after 12th standard ( I was in 7th standard then).
I guess every new year I face the same dilemma as to what to do to celebrate the damn new year's eve. Well, since when celebration has become a need ? However, friends celebrate, families celebrate, colleagues celebrate, strangers celebrate - so well me celebrates.
Happy domestication - oops - happy new year folks!
addendum: It rocked!
So well how are you celebrating?
"..ummm well I am planning to do lots of things"
yeah so what are you gonna do ?
"err... well I am gonna have lots of fun"
---
Last time I felt cornered this way was when one of my uncles were interogating me on what I want to do after 12th standard ( I was in 7th standard then).
I guess every new year I face the same dilemma as to what to do to celebrate the damn new year's eve. Well, since when celebration has become a need ? However, friends celebrate, families celebrate, colleagues celebrate, strangers celebrate - so well me celebrates.
Happy domestication - oops - happy new year folks!
addendum: It rocked!
Friday, December 29, 2006
Haiku
As per dictionary.com -
A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
Have been trying that for a while - it's fun:
The blithe moonlit stream
And the playful southern breeze
Brings you back to me
---
The drunken lady
Resonates youthful laughter
Flight of fantasy
---
the fun part is adhering to the syllable constraint ...worth a try ...
A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.
Have been trying that for a while - it's fun:
The blithe moonlit stream
And the playful southern breeze
Brings you back to me
---
The drunken lady
Resonates youthful laughter
Flight of fantasy
---
the fun part is adhering to the syllable constraint ...worth a try ...
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Being commited ...
what is this commitment drama I am seeing now-a-days?
If there is love then isn't it same as love (what more can you promise) and if there is no love then isn't it same as abstinence (what less can you promise)!
If there is love then isn't it same as love (what more can you promise) and if there is no love then isn't it same as abstinence (what less can you promise)!
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Showerless in Seattle
Well not quite literally though (want to save my rep) - for those of you who have not been really in sync with headlines of cnn.com - seattle was hit by a storm last thu night and since then we had no power in most of the places - well- few of the places - ahem well -very few of the places -ahem well in my apartment complex (and there are always some unfortunate few) - and ahem well in Sam's apartment.
So here are the details in chronological order - from an eye witness (who is me - my news channel is currently a bit understaffed):
Thursday -
Thu Night(sorry we don't track dates - this is all the info you get for free) - I finished Wuthering heights (talks about some ghosts at the end) (this info was for building up the background)
Thu midnight - I hear loud noises of wind whistling. I saw a tree swaying violantly in the wind - I wondered whether it will fall on my car (left) or abhishek ram's( my neighbour's) car (right). Thankfully it didnt fall.
Thu sometime after that - power went off (that was the last time i felt electricity in my apartment till ...)
Friday-
Fri morning - Driving to office. All signals off - traffic packed - cars moving slowly one at a time - One collegue called and said dont come to office. I turned back towards home. Other colleague (read boss) called - said come to office - so turned back to office.
Fri 10 am - In office (total 5 people) wondering what to do (hadnt taken shower) - went to another colleague's place - got a silver suitcase that had poker cards and chips - played poker in the office lounge
Fri - 2 pm - hungry- We started looking for food. Finally found a place at 4 pm which had 45 mins wait - ate and boxed the rest for rainy days (havent eaten that till now though)
Fri night - Went home - My mobile was not working - there was no light - it was deadly cold. There was 1 candle in the house (since it was an expensive candle so didnt want to burn it totally off) - do i have a choice? It was dark and cold ... i remembered wuthering heights - whoaa ghosts!! finally i heard someone on the stairs - ghosts - what - with high heels - that was my chinese neighbour (what my neighbours are chinese!) used her phone to call friends who were looking for food in bellevue.
Fri night after 30 mins - bell rings (nothing works but the door bell works)- rescued by friends. Wow!
Fri night -went to dinner at "king n i" and then to movie (holiday - total chick flick)
Fri - came back and froze to sleep at home
Saturday -
Sat morning -no chai (gas is electric)- ran to neighbor (abhishek ram's apmnt) - had cold coffee - he had a landline - made few calls found microsoft building 50 has power
Sat noon- went to building 50 took shower(for 30 mins) and had tea and biscuits there. Everyone came - we went to Kent Punjabi sweets for food - ate heartily
Sat - eve - yash and narendra rescued - went to movie - kabul express (boo hoo hoo)- and then came back with firewood for some fire - lo there was electircity at Y's and N's apartment (but not mine - how can a low end aparment like parks have and not adagio)- slept there - it was warm finally.
Sunday-
Sun morning - woke up at 9 - went to proclub (gym) for shower (at 2 pm)
Sun eve- went for shopping with Yash, Narendra and Yash's mom and compensated for all the losses i had in life with the only profit I had made so far.
Sun night - Slept again at yash's place
Monday-
Mon morning -came to office - no shower.
Mon night - Dinner at Paramesh - finally took shower and camped at Dami's place with G3 and Sam.
Tuesday-
Tue morning - woke up - made chai - 4 people chit-chating - well its not that bad - felt as if I was holidaying at friend's place.
Tue afternoon - power came in Adagio - was informed by 3 people that they could see lights on inside my apartment (may be i should keep my blinds closed)
Tue night - went to gym and showered there- went home - I had power ...
Wednesday -
Wed morning - my manager kept a 9.30 am meeting - rushed to office
Wed 9.30 - meeting got postponed to 10.30.
This kinda summarizes:
http://nagapuram.blogspot.com/2006/12/blackout.html
So here are the details in chronological order - from an eye witness (who is me - my news channel is currently a bit understaffed):
Thursday -
Thu Night(sorry we don't track dates - this is all the info you get for free) - I finished Wuthering heights (talks about some ghosts at the end) (this info was for building up the background)
Thu midnight - I hear loud noises of wind whistling. I saw a tree swaying violantly in the wind - I wondered whether it will fall on my car (left) or abhishek ram's( my neighbour's) car (right). Thankfully it didnt fall.
Thu sometime after that - power went off (that was the last time i felt electricity in my apartment till ...)
Friday-
Fri morning - Driving to office. All signals off - traffic packed - cars moving slowly one at a time - One collegue called and said dont come to office. I turned back towards home. Other colleague (read boss) called - said come to office - so turned back to office.
Fri 10 am - In office (total 5 people) wondering what to do (hadnt taken shower) - went to another colleague's place - got a silver suitcase that had poker cards and chips - played poker in the office lounge
Fri - 2 pm - hungry- We started looking for food. Finally found a place at 4 pm which had 45 mins wait - ate and boxed the rest for rainy days (havent eaten that till now though)
Fri night - Went home - My mobile was not working - there was no light - it was deadly cold. There was 1 candle in the house (since it was an expensive candle so didnt want to burn it totally off) - do i have a choice? It was dark and cold ... i remembered wuthering heights - whoaa ghosts!! finally i heard someone on the stairs - ghosts - what - with high heels - that was my chinese neighbour (what my neighbours are chinese!) used her phone to call friends who were looking for food in bellevue.
Fri night after 30 mins - bell rings (nothing works but the door bell works)- rescued by friends. Wow!
Fri night -went to dinner at "king n i" and then to movie (holiday - total chick flick)
Fri - came back and froze to sleep at home
Saturday -
Sat morning -no chai (gas is electric)- ran to neighbor (abhishek ram's apmnt) - had cold coffee - he had a landline - made few calls found microsoft building 50 has power
Sat noon- went to building 50 took shower(for 30 mins) and had tea and biscuits there. Everyone came - we went to Kent Punjabi sweets for food - ate heartily
Sat - eve - yash and narendra rescued - went to movie - kabul express (boo hoo hoo)- and then came back with firewood for some fire - lo there was electircity at Y's and N's apartment (but not mine - how can a low end aparment like parks have and not adagio)- slept there - it was warm finally.
Sunday-
Sun morning - woke up at 9 - went to proclub (gym) for shower (at 2 pm)
Sun eve- went for shopping with Yash, Narendra and Yash's mom and compensated for all the losses i had in life with the only profit I had made so far.
Sun night - Slept again at yash's place
Monday-
Mon morning -came to office - no shower.
Mon night - Dinner at Paramesh - finally took shower and camped at Dami's place with G3 and Sam.
Tuesday-
Tue morning - woke up - made chai - 4 people chit-chating - well its not that bad - felt as if I was holidaying at friend's place.
Tue afternoon - power came in Adagio - was informed by 3 people that they could see lights on inside my apartment (may be i should keep my blinds closed)
Tue night - went to gym and showered there- went home - I had power ...
Wednesday -
Wed morning - my manager kept a 9.30 am meeting - rushed to office
Wed 9.30 - meeting got postponed to 10.30.
This kinda summarizes:
http://nagapuram.blogspot.com/2006/12/blackout.html
Thursday, December 14, 2006
Guru ...
After having met a person who is member of a cult and has a Guru to whom he has dedicated most of his life too, and learning about few more such persons (co-incidentally at the same time) I got into this debate - is having a Guru good or not? Are all the Gurus out there to capitalize on human minds or are there some who are there to nurture them?
And then was wondering, what makes a person seek a Guru?
Well we know that human mind is inquisitive, there are questions - that are yet not explained - concept of God, concept of life and concept of death ...it is sometimes good to question - but how correct it is to find some answers and believe in them to an extent that it sabotages your normal life?
I alternate between believing in God and believing in randomness -all the time ...I don't know if that is right or having a consistent belief is better ..it works well for me - I feel it balances me out from drifting on either side (though I must say I am a bit partial to the fact that God exists - there is a certain comfort in that thought - you know like someone is figuring things out for you).
I was told by one of the followers that - you have to give up your mind - if you continue to reason everything then you will never experience the truth - but for me giving up the mind is like giving up me ..and if I give up myself then how can I experience? ...In this living form, are we adequate to realize the truth? Or is it just me who is naive?
What makes a person seek a Guru? Does he get answers of all the questions in that person? And gets a purpose in that devotion? Answers and purpose that he cannot reason but he can believe - belief without reason? Is it realizable? reasonable? And then aren't the most real emotions of life unreasonable - like love ... - Is finding a Guru like falling in love - experiencing the pleasure of getting psychologically seduced - experiencing the comfort of being belonged - or of belonging? ...Or is it just an illusion? A mind game that targeted your vulnerabilty...may be your inquisitiveness too ...I am still confused ?
---
"It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers."
- James Thurber
And then was wondering, what makes a person seek a Guru?
Well we know that human mind is inquisitive, there are questions - that are yet not explained - concept of God, concept of life and concept of death ...it is sometimes good to question - but how correct it is to find some answers and believe in them to an extent that it sabotages your normal life?
I alternate between believing in God and believing in randomness -all the time ...I don't know if that is right or having a consistent belief is better ..it works well for me - I feel it balances me out from drifting on either side (though I must say I am a bit partial to the fact that God exists - there is a certain comfort in that thought - you know like someone is figuring things out for you).
I was told by one of the followers that - you have to give up your mind - if you continue to reason everything then you will never experience the truth - but for me giving up the mind is like giving up me ..and if I give up myself then how can I experience? ...In this living form, are we adequate to realize the truth? Or is it just me who is naive?
What makes a person seek a Guru? Does he get answers of all the questions in that person? And gets a purpose in that devotion? Answers and purpose that he cannot reason but he can believe - belief without reason? Is it realizable? reasonable? And then aren't the most real emotions of life unreasonable - like love ... - Is finding a Guru like falling in love - experiencing the pleasure of getting psychologically seduced - experiencing the comfort of being belonged - or of belonging? ...Or is it just an illusion? A mind game that targeted your vulnerabilty...may be your inquisitiveness too ...I am still confused ?
---
"It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers."
- James Thurber
Saturday, December 09, 2006
7 innocent secrets of success
A fwd from my dad:
Q: What are the 7 secrets of success?
A: answers in one room.
1. Roof said: Aim should be high.
2. Fan said: Be Cool
3. Clock said: Every min. is precious.
4. Mirror said: Reflect before you act.
5. Window said: See the world
6. Calendar said: Be up-to-date
7. Door said: Push hard to achieve Ur goals.
Q: What are the 7 secrets of success?
A: answers in one room.
1. Roof said: Aim should be high.
2. Fan said: Be Cool
3. Clock said: Every min. is precious.
4. Mirror said: Reflect before you act.
5. Window said: See the world
6. Calendar said: Be up-to-date
7. Door said: Push hard to achieve Ur goals.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
Illusions ...
"...I felt the sun burning in my eyes and head - knocking me down as if thousand hammers were hitting me - all over. My dried tongue went over my parched lips ...I thought I would die...I needed strength ..I needed hope...
and I fell down and rolled down the sand - half buried - No I wouldn't give up - I stood up slowly - walked ahead towards the direction I thought was right ... walked like a drunk looking for his home...I climbed up again. There at a distance ... I saw - Yes I saw - the broken continuity of the dreary dessert ... I saw a settlement of people. Do I see trees too? Can I have water there? Can I be saved? Is that my hope? I saw colors in women's clothes and men in whites. Are those camels seated there ? Can I make it? Make it to that finishing line ? I know I can...my intuition said so...my intuition ...my desire to live... and then I moved inch by inch ... My will stronger than me ... I wanted to get there - my finishing line. I wished if someone from them saw me they would catch hold of me and save me ...can someone save me...but they are indulged in themselves...aren't they always? I crawled - tried to stand but midway fell on the sand - face in the sand - sand in my mouth - my mouth so dry that the sand couldn't stay - but I could feel the taste - I moved - for my finishing line - inch by inch and then I felt one final surge... of my will - of divine energy from within my soul ... I stood up and ran - my need of survival ... yeah ... I stood up ... I ran ... I ran my gaze steady on my finishing line ... I ran till they could see me and I could see them ... in their eyes ... and there they were ... I felt the relief -the relief made me weak ... and ...then I fell on sand again - straight - like a body without life - a body deserted by its soul ... my hand just touching my finishing line - a few feet away ...my face in the sand ... sand in my mouth - my mouth so dry that the sand couldn't stay ... but I could feel the taste.. the taste now familiar - as if it was my own ...and after a while ... I moved ... my hands moved and then my eyes opened - lifeless eyelids - my head moved out of the sand and I looked .. I looked up and saw..."
and I fell down and rolled down the sand - half buried - No I wouldn't give up - I stood up slowly - walked ahead towards the direction I thought was right ... walked like a drunk looking for his home...I climbed up again. There at a distance ... I saw - Yes I saw - the broken continuity of the dreary dessert ... I saw a settlement of people. Do I see trees too? Can I have water there? Can I be saved? Is that my hope? I saw colors in women's clothes and men in whites. Are those camels seated there ? Can I make it? Make it to that finishing line ? I know I can...my intuition said so...my intuition ...my desire to live... and then I moved inch by inch ... My will stronger than me ... I wanted to get there - my finishing line. I wished if someone from them saw me they would catch hold of me and save me ...can someone save me...but they are indulged in themselves...aren't they always? I crawled - tried to stand but midway fell on the sand - face in the sand - sand in my mouth - my mouth so dry that the sand couldn't stay - but I could feel the taste - I moved - for my finishing line - inch by inch and then I felt one final surge... of my will - of divine energy from within my soul ... I stood up and ran - my need of survival ... yeah ... I stood up ... I ran ... I ran my gaze steady on my finishing line ... I ran till they could see me and I could see them ... in their eyes ... and there they were ... I felt the relief -the relief made me weak ... and ...then I fell on sand again - straight - like a body without life - a body deserted by its soul ... my hand just touching my finishing line - a few feet away ...my face in the sand ... sand in my mouth - my mouth so dry that the sand couldn't stay ... but I could feel the taste.. the taste now familiar - as if it was my own ...and after a while ... I moved ... my hands moved and then my eyes opened - lifeless eyelids - my head moved out of the sand and I looked .. I looked up and saw..."
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Getting the head and "tail" of it!
I remember reading about friction in one of my science classes. And also gravity. Ofcourse I never got that demonstrated to me so well. Wish my life was as lucky as Newton's who saw an apple falling from top of the tree but unfortunately in my story I was the apple.
More old lessons got revised - one was the bio lesson - heard of something called tail bone (coccyx). Well yes it exists! And it is important. Newbee question - "Why do we have a tail bone if we do not have a tail?"
Well as Vids mentioned - Things can never be so bad that it cannot be worse. So here are the top things that I got out of lying flat in my flat:
- Calls from people.
- Didn't have to fill my movemap.
- Best friends cooking food at my place :)
- Getting food delivered from restaurant without lifting a finger
- People dropping in for Chai.
- Me getting down to finally reading wuthering heights, cat's cradle and watching flavors.
- Can potentially afford 24 hours of sleep per day (I could afford it only for 2 days in my life when I was born but after that never got the opportunity).
- Knowledge about what a doughnut pillow is. Sorry it is not edible.
- Eating non-stop and guiltlessly.
- Spending time in my apartment where I pay so much rent.
It is like extended holiday for me. Though I hate to admit - I miss not working for so long now. But well - who cares. So cheers to gravity - bottoms up - ouch!
More old lessons got revised - one was the bio lesson - heard of something called tail bone (coccyx). Well yes it exists! And it is important. Newbee question - "Why do we have a tail bone if we do not have a tail?"
Well as Vids mentioned - Things can never be so bad that it cannot be worse. So here are the top things that I got out of lying flat in my flat:
- Calls from people.
- Didn't have to fill my movemap.
- Best friends cooking food at my place :)
- Getting food delivered from restaurant without lifting a finger
- People dropping in for Chai.
- Me getting down to finally reading wuthering heights, cat's cradle and watching flavors.
- Can potentially afford 24 hours of sleep per day (I could afford it only for 2 days in my life when I was born but after that never got the opportunity).
- Knowledge about what a doughnut pillow is. Sorry it is not edible.
- Eating non-stop and guiltlessly.
- Spending time in my apartment where I pay so much rent.
It is like extended holiday for me. Though I hate to admit - I miss not working for so long now. But well - who cares. So cheers to gravity - bottoms up - ouch!
Friday, December 01, 2006
half baked cookies
Allegedly, we all have souls. something that continues to exist even after we die... death is loss of rest of the things - this body and loss of connections - connections with people that you share your incarnation with ...it means loss of context ...
we are born alone but as we grow parts of other people find their place in our tiny hearts ... and parts of us grow in theirs...and eventually it all ends ...our death signifies not just our end but end of those tiny treasured aspects of people who had become integral part of us ...and when someone we love die - we mourn the loss - of them and of us...as if we are not just contained within this body but are spread all around ...each of us in each of us ...
...how I wish if some connections continue to exist forever...Do they?
we are born alone but as we grow parts of other people find their place in our tiny hearts ... and parts of us grow in theirs...and eventually it all ends ...our death signifies not just our end but end of those tiny treasured aspects of people who had become integral part of us ...and when someone we love die - we mourn the loss - of them and of us...as if we are not just contained within this body but are spread all around ...each of us in each of us ...
...how I wish if some connections continue to exist forever...Do they?
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
vacouver trip photos
http://www1.snapfish.com/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=138614875/a=54889431_54889431/t_=54889431
Coming up next- Indy trip photos
Coming up next- Indy trip photos
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Vacouver Tourism - a trip to remember
This Thanksgiving break I thought of giving myself a big break and planned 2 trips back to back - Vancouver and Indianapolis.
Well came back from Vancouver and it is the most amazing city I have been to (besides Nagpur.) We were staying in Fairmount Waterfront hotel in the downtown (This post is all about show off ).
The trip started with us getting a speeding ticket (and I am pretty sure we were not speeding) on I-5 by a cop who was ambushed with a civilian car and a stupid radar. Once we entered Vacouver - we were amazed by the size of the down town - they had three clusters of downtown and beautiful bridges and mountains.
We reached Vancouver around Sun night. Spent most of the Sun night shopping. g3 got her cool new jacket in the robson street which you will see her waering in rest of the photos(from ESPIRIT).
Woke up Mon morning and admired the great view from the hotel- and pitied all the poor people who had gone to work that monday >:).
We went for some sight seeing - took a long route and accidentally entered the stanley park and got some good shots there.
The high point (both literally and figuratively) was the Grouse mountain - were we took a trolley (sky-ride) upto a snow covered mountain and hiked in the snow. The best comment was from Dami - "I can feel only 1 leg out of my four limbs!". It's funny even up there you can find starbucks equivalent coffee to defreeze yourself. It was fun playing in the snow (we invented and played the game of putting snow in the mouth of an huge open-mouthed grizzely bear's statue) and ofcourse we took our jackets off and freaked out in the snow for a moment.
Later -the suspended bridge - was spooky and amazing - at a point we literally felt that the bridge was swinging up in the mid air. They had a warning sign near their parking - "Warning - Car thiefs work here." but thankfully nobody stole our honda civic.
Later at night - we were back to downtown - our very own Robson street and went around for food and some photography -
We did som desi-pana by clicking photos with Ash and Shahrukh.
We also saw the steam clock in the Gastown.
Later at night we chatted and photographed a lot near the hotel ballroom.
Next morning we woke up and went to Granville island (which is a spread out version of Pike's market). The view of the waterfront from there was awesome.
Later we came back to Robson - to the Pacific Shopping Center where we had our lunch.
Also revisited the Stanley Park to see the totelpoles and the lady in swimsuit.
Finally took off via Surrey (which has 88% sikh and 8% hindu population) - stopped in a sweets shop - had samosas, jalebi and chai - since the owner's response was not very prompt we kinda left without buying any sweets :(.
All in all the trip was awesome - Vacouver simply rocks -The Robson street to me now is as familiar as the 148th Street. The downtown - the food - the varied cuisine - the friendly people (damn canadians as per D)just seemed perfect. However the best part in the trip was company of friends who were equally crazy and enthusiastic, equally unfamiliar with Vancouver and most importantly equally camera-phylic!
Coming up next - Indy pics.
Well came back from Vancouver and it is the most amazing city I have been to (besides Nagpur.) We were staying in Fairmount Waterfront hotel in the downtown (This post is all about show off ).
The trip started with us getting a speeding ticket (and I am pretty sure we were not speeding) on I-5 by a cop who was ambushed with a civilian car and a stupid radar. Once we entered Vacouver - we were amazed by the size of the down town - they had three clusters of downtown and beautiful bridges and mountains.
We reached Vancouver around Sun night. Spent most of the Sun night shopping. g3 got her cool new jacket in the robson street which you will see her waering in rest of the photos(from ESPIRIT).
Woke up Mon morning and admired the great view from the hotel- and pitied all the poor people who had gone to work that monday >:).
We went for some sight seeing - took a long route and accidentally entered the stanley park and got some good shots there.
The high point (both literally and figuratively) was the Grouse mountain - were we took a trolley (sky-ride) upto a snow covered mountain and hiked in the snow. The best comment was from Dami - "I can feel only 1 leg out of my four limbs!". It's funny even up there you can find starbucks equivalent coffee to defreeze yourself. It was fun playing in the snow (we invented and played the game of putting snow in the mouth of an huge open-mouthed grizzely bear's statue) and ofcourse we took our jackets off and freaked out in the snow for a moment.
Later -the suspended bridge - was spooky and amazing - at a point we literally felt that the bridge was swinging up in the mid air. They had a warning sign near their parking - "Warning - Car thiefs work here." but thankfully nobody stole our honda civic.
Later at night - we were back to downtown - our very own Robson street and went around for food and some photography -
We did som desi-pana by clicking photos with Ash and Shahrukh.
We also saw the steam clock in the Gastown.
Later at night we chatted and photographed a lot near the hotel ballroom.
Next morning we woke up and went to Granville island (which is a spread out version of Pike's market). The view of the waterfront from there was awesome.
Later we came back to Robson - to the Pacific Shopping Center where we had our lunch.
Also revisited the Stanley Park to see the totelpoles and the lady in swimsuit.
Finally took off via Surrey (which has 88% sikh and 8% hindu population) - stopped in a sweets shop - had samosas, jalebi and chai - since the owner's response was not very prompt we kinda left without buying any sweets :(.
All in all the trip was awesome - Vacouver simply rocks -The Robson street to me now is as familiar as the 148th Street. The downtown - the food - the varied cuisine - the friendly people (damn canadians as per D)just seemed perfect. However the best part in the trip was company of friends who were equally crazy and enthusiastic, equally unfamiliar with Vancouver and most importantly equally camera-phylic!
Coming up next - Indy pics.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Resume
Was working on my resume - no not looking for jobs but for some other reason (after a certain age you realize that you cannot get a new job or a new guy in your life) - well cribs apart - was thinking about the extra-curricular activities. Some activities like organizing events, being part of various local committees (where we attended lots of useless meetings (and as the legend goes in every meeting we decided what to decide in the next meeting)) seemed fairly useless. But however, in those days they generated max enthu in me - I still remember editing the ACA newsletter with Pathak till 4 in the morning then, judging the softwares and finding bugs with Ankur all night (different Ankur - not you) before the techfest. In VRCE all my extra-cirricular activities were tightly coupled with what Vids did - and I guess that's the reason why inspite of being in different branch (I CS and she MET) we kinda amalagaMETed (sorry Vids I stole this word from you).
And I remember sitting and giving titles to every prof during departmental gatherings, or seniors at the time of farewell, making personality contest forms, deciding what to have as fillers in various events (for some strange reason, I didn't have so much of stage fright then), deciding on a theme while compering etc . I still remember the personality contest in 1st year when I turned up only to find 1000s (or more than that) people in the auditiorium all loud and yelling and my first instinct was to dig a well and jump into it, or the fresher's dance (which was quite a hit;)) and the fashion show (that we eventually converted into a dance). Actually I still remember one of the questions asked during the personality contest by a poker-faced guy("what if you were hillary clinton and bill clinton had cheated on you?" - ohmygosh!)
And yes I learnt a lot in my classes, lots more during the exams (when we really studied) but there are some core skills like -ability to work in a team, ability to act goofy, ability to approach new people (yes I was born and brough up as a shy girl unless VRCE happened), ability to tolerate untolerable people (still working on that) and ability to make new people feel at home (after bullying them to the hilt) - that I learnt only from these extra-cirricular activities.
But as morpheus said - fate has its own irony - none of these activities are part of my resume today!
And I remember sitting and giving titles to every prof during departmental gatherings, or seniors at the time of farewell, making personality contest forms, deciding what to have as fillers in various events (for some strange reason, I didn't have so much of stage fright then), deciding on a theme while compering etc . I still remember the personality contest in 1st year when I turned up only to find 1000s (or more than that) people in the auditiorium all loud and yelling and my first instinct was to dig a well and jump into it, or the fresher's dance (which was quite a hit;)) and the fashion show (that we eventually converted into a dance). Actually I still remember one of the questions asked during the personality contest by a poker-faced guy("what if you were hillary clinton and bill clinton had cheated on you?" - ohmygosh!)
And yes I learnt a lot in my classes, lots more during the exams (when we really studied) but there are some core skills like -ability to work in a team, ability to act goofy, ability to approach new people (yes I was born and brough up as a shy girl unless VRCE happened), ability to tolerate untolerable people (still working on that) and ability to make new people feel at home (after bullying them to the hilt) - that I learnt only from these extra-cirricular activities.
But as morpheus said - fate has its own irony - none of these activities are part of my resume today!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
food for thought - North America versus India
Overheard:
In India and China everything is possible but everything is hard.
In North America there are things that are not possible but everything is easy.
That's the choice you need to make.
A nice song after a long time - incidentally this is number one in India (again overheard):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY_9Lc0v1Gs&mode=related&search=
In India and China everything is possible but everything is hard.
In North America there are things that are not possible but everything is easy.
That's the choice you need to make.
A nice song after a long time - incidentally this is number one in India (again overheard):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UY_9Lc0v1Gs&mode=related&search=
What's the equation dude?
What the heck - I slog day in a day out - I see the scale going down - 115 - 114.6 - 114 - 113.6 - 113.4 and then it is 113. Wow! 2 pounds in 4 days. And then one temptation - one dinner out (that too vegan and with the skewed respective appetite dividing the bill by 1/2 didnt seemed fair (well it's my hard-earned money and that was a huge bill)) and that's it - its back to 115. What's the deal - how does it work - can't debug it - is there a neural net there (hell'lo!).
Well since the day I was mentally born - I have these two issues - that I am overweight and that I have a bad hairstyle.
For today, let's just talk about issue one. And for it I credit my classmate (MB) in 10th when we were having some height weight ratio determination - for my weight (which at that that time was same as it is now) - he had exclaimed - "Girl's mein highest". At that point it sounded as if it was something like a "aakashvani"(I am sure I saw some lightening also up there...).
Losing weight is not impossible - have done that once - and constantly do that in intervals- but this time just don't feel motivated. I mean the last successful attempt was when I was below 18. Now I am wiser (before saying anything remember that you dont know how wise I was at 18)- Well - if I lose weight - I am not going to change my wardrobe (will continue to wear my oversized jackets and jeans). I think I am fairly active (except for mandatory 9 hours of sleep), my friend's car will still accomodate me as the 5th passenger, my insurance rate, my house rent etc etc will not change, nor will my coding style. I don't have to worry about gaining weight, rather I will save myself from future disappointments incase I later gain weight.
Infact I think there are advantages of being over-weight - one being getting rid of the fear that you will be overweight coz dude (dudette) you already are (its all about having the security of having the best case equal to worst case)! You can poke fun at all those anoeroxic self-weight-obsessed girls (pamper your alter-ego that is). And well the biggest one being- people who really love you will have more of you :).
P.S - Told ya - shouldn't have gotten me drunk.
Well since the day I was mentally born - I have these two issues - that I am overweight and that I have a bad hairstyle.
For today, let's just talk about issue one. And for it I credit my classmate (MB) in 10th when we were having some height weight ratio determination - for my weight (which at that that time was same as it is now) - he had exclaimed - "Girl's mein highest". At that point it sounded as if it was something like a "aakashvani"(I am sure I saw some lightening also up there...).
Losing weight is not impossible - have done that once - and constantly do that in intervals- but this time just don't feel motivated. I mean the last successful attempt was when I was below 18. Now I am wiser (before saying anything remember that you dont know how wise I was at 18)- Well - if I lose weight - I am not going to change my wardrobe (will continue to wear my oversized jackets and jeans). I think I am fairly active (except for mandatory 9 hours of sleep), my friend's car will still accomodate me as the 5th passenger, my insurance rate, my house rent etc etc will not change, nor will my coding style. I don't have to worry about gaining weight, rather I will save myself from future disappointments incase I later gain weight.
Infact I think there are advantages of being over-weight - one being getting rid of the fear that you will be overweight coz dude (dudette) you already are (its all about having the security of having the best case equal to worst case)! You can poke fun at all those anoeroxic self-weight-obsessed girls (pamper your alter-ego that is). And well the biggest one being- people who really love you will have more of you :).
P.S - Told ya - shouldn't have gotten me drunk.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Friends may come and go ...
But sisters are forever ...
Call from cherry -
"Oh aapke 11 baj gaye hain kya? Arre bahut late ho gaya"
Call from cherry -
"Oh aapke 11 baj gaye hain kya? Arre bahut late ho gaya"
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Are we Alone ?
On of my friends in Pune (yes I have friends from Pune too - what do you think) once told me - "we are alone in life in our most heart-felt moments". His words never sounded more true ... though at that time it sounded contrary to the life I had - crowded - I had wondered for a long time - "Are we humans alone?" - aren't we social animals - part of a fabric - don't know whether we are alone may be yes - are we independent - well ...
On a related note - today in office A and L said that they saw a flying saucer (UFO category) outside the cafeteria - "Well again -are we humans alone?"
On a related note - today in office A and L said that they saw a flying saucer (UFO category) outside the cafeteria - "Well again -are we humans alone?"
Friday, November 03, 2006
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
2nd Nov 2006 in India
One of my very close friends is getting married - how I wish I could be there with her :(
Saturday, October 28, 2006
hey wassup
A typical conversation:
"hey dude - Wassup"
"hey - Wassup"
(And no matter how much you are tempted to answer - "the ceiling" - you end the conversation there)
Well not very long ago - actually a year ago when I was new in US - I didnt know the right answer to this question - So used to say what I thought was the right answer. So a typical answer from my end was:
"You know I am looking for an apartment but I am not sure where to look and do you leave in east side and I want an apartment that is close by so that I can go easy on buying a car for myself so soon .."
and by that time the person would have either completely gone bored or disappeared. And then I would wonder - why are they asking me wassup if they really don't wanna know wassup!
And then I was told (by my inner voice) - "You know what - no one really cares about what your problems in life are because that's what they precisely are- your problems" - so next time when people asked "Wassup" I would say - "Its a beautiful day and the sun is bright".
And the other guy would go - "yeah and I went with my wife for fishing and the fish in that pond was x kgs heavy" (awright- he said x pounds)
And I would go "he he he he he he, he he he he he he" (this is called a fake laughter)(Just an unwanted tip - if you dunno what to say - just laugh - no wonder why I laugh so much - what did you say - he he he he he he, he he he he he he- okay got it ;) ).
So anyway as the days passed by - my inner voice had another suggestion for me - "You know what before the person asks wassup and you start wasting your creative juices on how to describe the weekend weather - you ask wassup first". So now the tables were turned:
The first person I saw, I said - "Hey" and he said "hey" and before that completed I said wassup and guess what he replied as - "wassup"! and from there evolved the most efficient protocol of greeting people :
"Wassup"
"Wassup"
God knows what happened to our simple old fashioned "Hi".
"hey dude - Wassup"
"hey - Wassup"
(And no matter how much you are tempted to answer - "the ceiling" - you end the conversation there)
Well not very long ago - actually a year ago when I was new in US - I didnt know the right answer to this question - So used to say what I thought was the right answer. So a typical answer from my end was:
"You know I am looking for an apartment but I am not sure where to look and do you leave in east side and I want an apartment that is close by so that I can go easy on buying a car for myself so soon .."
and by that time the person would have either completely gone bored or disappeared. And then I would wonder - why are they asking me wassup if they really don't wanna know wassup!
And then I was told (by my inner voice) - "You know what - no one really cares about what your problems in life are because that's what they precisely are- your problems" - so next time when people asked "Wassup" I would say - "Its a beautiful day and the sun is bright".
And the other guy would go - "yeah and I went with my wife for fishing and the fish in that pond was x kgs heavy" (awright- he said x pounds)
And I would go "he he he he he he, he he he he he he" (this is called a fake laughter)(Just an unwanted tip - if you dunno what to say - just laugh - no wonder why I laugh so much - what did you say - he he he he he he, he he he he he he- okay got it ;) ).
So anyway as the days passed by - my inner voice had another suggestion for me - "You know what before the person asks wassup and you start wasting your creative juices on how to describe the weekend weather - you ask wassup first". So now the tables were turned:
The first person I saw, I said - "Hey" and he said "hey" and before that completed I said wassup and guess what he replied as - "wassup"! and from there evolved the most efficient protocol of greeting people :
"Wassup"
"Wassup"
God knows what happened to our simple old fashioned "Hi".
Thursday, October 26, 2006
socha na tha ...
A movie that came and went but got noticed - at least by me for being so sweet cute and dealing with psychology of a innocent mind in a very fun and cute way ...
I also love all the songs of this movie -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63_xVnMvmpk&mode=related&search=
I also love all the songs of this movie -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=63_xVnMvmpk&mode=related&search=
question
should i move out or should I stay put?
Addendum -
I was doing apartment search when I wrote this found hampton is 1000 (but it is not my fav - to be polite) and parks is 995 (again not my fav) - so was thinking should I stick to my current apartment adagio or move out.
Addendum -
I was doing apartment search when I wrote this found hampton is 1000 (but it is not my fav - to be polite) and parks is 995 (again not my fav) - so was thinking should I stick to my current apartment adagio or move out.
Monday, October 23, 2006
this post
is dedicated to all those who forgot their lunch at home and couldn't find any decent company to have lunch with and are struggling with their slippery pasta on their desk..
Friday, October 20, 2006
happy diwali
Nothing can beat the excitement of getting a call from the relatives and talking to people ranging in age from 5 to 65. Though - conversation with everyone is limited to 4 sentences:
"Happy diwaali"
"Kya kar rahee hai"
"India Kab aa rahee hai"
"Le mausi(badee maami/mama/choti maami/chiku/chutki/...) se baat kar"
The call demonstrates round robin scheduling in its full glory. I also love the fact that everyone talks real loud - coz we have called america - and the excitement is infectious and so I talk back pretty loudly as well (which I do in normal case too but well).
Today the best question came from my 5 year old cousin(girl) who asked in the cutest voice ever - "wahaan raat ho rahee hai kya abhi?"
Has it ever happened that a phone call has taken you to a place where you have been before - and you are reminded about everything - people - the house - the color of the tubelight - the same dining table - the smell of the kitchen - tv playing somewhere -the sound of the cooler ...Calls like these just get me in touch with so much innocence and love - a full family about whom I almost forget about in my day-to-day life...
"Happy diwaali"
"Kya kar rahee hai"
"India Kab aa rahee hai"
"Le mausi(badee maami/mama/choti maami/chiku/chutki/...) se baat kar"
The call demonstrates round robin scheduling in its full glory. I also love the fact that everyone talks real loud - coz we have called america - and the excitement is infectious and so I talk back pretty loudly as well (which I do in normal case too but well).
Today the best question came from my 5 year old cousin(girl) who asked in the cutest voice ever - "wahaan raat ho rahee hai kya abhi?"
Has it ever happened that a phone call has taken you to a place where you have been before - and you are reminded about everything - people - the house - the color of the tubelight - the same dining table - the smell of the kitchen - tv playing somewhere -the sound of the cooler ...Calls like these just get me in touch with so much innocence and love - a full family about whom I almost forget about in my day-to-day life...
Sunday, October 15, 2006
Feedback on my blog
So the reviews are out ...I scanned through all my mails that talked about my blog. Here are some of the comments that have made long lasting impression either because of the content or because of the commentator him/herself.
Asim - Don't think so much. I am getting worried
JK - Nice blog
Saurabh - You have a blog?
Kamra - tera blog ek dum timepass ho gaya hai aajkal :-) ..
D - Like arati I don't think too much in life.
K - Interesting stuff in your blog.
Asim - Stop writing your blog - stay away from your computer if you have no work.
Saurabh (after reading it) - Isko kaam do re koi.
Kamra - (second thoughts)(am making that out from ur blogs, u sound angry/frustated/cross/unhappy/ or what not over something) - followed by his advice -"you should get married"
V - My life is so hopeless I am reading your blogs
Asim- Ok, atleast stop writing you blog for next 20 days.
Every word mentioned above is true.
Asim - Don't think so much. I am getting worried
JK - Nice blog
Saurabh - You have a blog?
Kamra - tera blog ek dum timepass ho gaya hai aajkal :-) ..
D - Like arati I don't think too much in life.
K - Interesting stuff in your blog.
Asim - Stop writing your blog - stay away from your computer if you have no work.
Saurabh (after reading it) - Isko kaam do re koi.
Kamra - (second thoughts)
V - My life is so hopeless I am reading your blogs
Asim- Ok, atleast stop writing you blog for next 20 days.
Every word mentioned above is true.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
10th Oct 2006
2 teams
****** LOC
****** emails
****** useless emails
** useful emails
1 * **** *****
1 *********
* night outs
** slacking days
** weekends in office
*** coffees
1 year in MS
****** LOC
****** emails
****** useless emails
** useful emails
1 * **** *****
1 *********
* night outs
** slacking days
** weekends in office
*** coffees
1 year in MS
Sunday, October 08, 2006
people and web pages
Disclaimer 1- Digressing from usual topics
Disclaimer 2 - One of my sunday night (impending monday morning) insanities...
Just was thinking about web pages was wondering if the same equations come into play while assigning authority to a page as they come while we assign authority to a person in our society..Let's think about it:
1) Sphere of influence - People who have larger sphere of influence (a successful social worker (Mother Teresa) or an successful enterpreneur- Ambanis) - are the people who are weigthed higher. You know them because they are the people who matter to a lot of people - Similarly web pages who are being linked to from lots of pages are perceived to be important by page rank algorithm.
2) "Known to be good" - At some point these people had earned name and the brand name is continuing - especially true in India where a well-known family is always a well-known family. It is easy to know who they are as we always knew who they are (example - We always knew Princess Diana). Similarly we have known good web pages - wikipedia, microsoft.com etc
3) Junk - Though every person is useful for atleast one person (dude - himself, dudette - herself) - they are the set of the people whom the remaining other set detest - these could be chors, roberrers or beggars (believe it or not in today's world poverty is sin) - while it is easy to identify the last category, it is difficult to identify the conmens. And yes these category of people map to our junk pages - some of them harmful, some of them them useless. Some easily identifiable - some you will never identify.
4) Middle class - This is my kinda category - these are the people - not exactly junk (they believe so) and definitely not the most influential people in the society (and they know so). They might/might not be important for the small set of people who know them. What elevates them from junk - we don't know - is it the fact that they are good( 2 am friends) or is it a larger sphere of influence (big gangs), or is it some latent attribute we are unaware of. Are they still junk - we don't know that too. And that is the category where most of the web pages fall- middle class.
And there lies the challenge of a good ranking algorithm - how do we order all these middle class pages...tough job if you ask me.
Disclaimer 2 - One of my sunday night (impending monday morning) insanities...
Just was thinking about web pages was wondering if the same equations come into play while assigning authority to a page as they come while we assign authority to a person in our society..Let's think about it:
1) Sphere of influence - People who have larger sphere of influence (a successful social worker (Mother Teresa) or an successful enterpreneur- Ambanis) - are the people who are weigthed higher. You know them because they are the people who matter to a lot of people - Similarly web pages who are being linked to from lots of pages are perceived to be important by page rank algorithm.
2) "Known to be good" - At some point these people had earned name and the brand name is continuing - especially true in India where a well-known family is always a well-known family. It is easy to know who they are as we always knew who they are (example - We always knew Princess Diana). Similarly we have known good web pages - wikipedia, microsoft.com etc
3) Junk - Though every person is useful for atleast one person (dude - himself, dudette - herself) - they are the set of the people whom the remaining other set detest - these could be chors, roberrers or beggars (believe it or not in today's world poverty is sin) - while it is easy to identify the last category, it is difficult to identify the conmens. And yes these category of people map to our junk pages - some of them harmful, some of them them useless. Some easily identifiable - some you will never identify.
4) Middle class - This is my kinda category - these are the people - not exactly junk (they believe so) and definitely not the most influential people in the society (and they know so). They might/might not be important for the small set of people who know them. What elevates them from junk - we don't know - is it the fact that they are good( 2 am friends) or is it a larger sphere of influence (big gangs), or is it some latent attribute we are unaware of. Are they still junk - we don't know that too. And that is the category where most of the web pages fall- middle class.
And there lies the challenge of a good ranking algorithm - how do we order all these middle class pages...tough job if you ask me.
Friday, October 06, 2006
6th Oct 2006 -
1 car - 3 scratches
9 cuisines - 1 takila shot
1 India trip - 2 solo journeys ..
2 teams - 1 big project
4 skirts - 2 tank tops
10 lipsticks - 1 DKNY watch
0 affairs - 0 scandals
1 year in US ..
9 cuisines - 1 takila shot
1 India trip - 2 solo journeys ..
2 teams - 1 big project
4 skirts - 2 tank tops
10 lipsticks - 1 DKNY watch
0 affairs - 0 scandals
1 year in US ..
Thursday, October 05, 2006
The pleasure of having a free coffee ...
..and the guilt of it ... jogged for 45 mins in gym today...
Ate in a chinese buffet today in the afternoon (with A-B-Y - 3 diff pple from 3 different countries - Russia, US, China resp)- unlike in Indian buffet they come and serve you on your table and note the dishes you are taking so that you are charged accordingly...messed up with chopsticks - sushi is fine with chopsticks but not these huge stuff.
Right now eating kesar pista icecream that I got from Indian store.
Wow I am sleepy.
Ate in a chinese buffet today in the afternoon (with A-B-Y - 3 diff pple from 3 different countries - Russia, US, China resp)- unlike in Indian buffet they come and serve you on your table and note the dishes you are taking so that you are charged accordingly...messed up with chopsticks - sushi is fine with chopsticks but not these huge stuff.
Right now eating kesar pista icecream that I got from Indian store.
Wow I am sleepy.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
line of the day
A(angry mode) to S- I am too good for my own good
S to A- take copyright of that line better still write in your blog
S to A- take copyright of that line better still write in your blog
3 golden rules of giving a good presentation
1) The audience should be convinced that you are a good authority on the topic you are presenting. They should believe that you know more than them.
2) The audience should understand what you are talking about.
3) You can sacrifice 2 for the sake of 1.
2) The audience should understand what you are talking about.
3) You can sacrifice 2 for the sake of 1.
Monday, October 02, 2006
happy dussera
:).Invitation by bama for dussera dinner tonight - she has made kheer :).
and I have also got pooran poli (http://www.surfindia.com/recipes/pooran-poli.html) for lunch (just co-incidence).
Addemdum - today is gandhi jayanti also...
and I have also got pooran poli (http://www.surfindia.com/recipes/pooran-poli.html) for lunch (just co-incidence).
Addemdum - today is gandhi jayanti also...
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